Op-Ed: Now I know why Kristi Noem has the best-behaved dogs in all of South Dakota
By: Kay Nynes, Pierre, South Dakota
I have been Kristi Noem’s next-door neighbor for close to 10 years. During that time, I must say, Kristi and her family have had the best-behaved dogs that I have ever seen. Forget acting better than children; I have seen full-grown adults not be as polite, courteous or mature as these dogs.
They never bark during the night. They never chase the mailman. They never jump on dinner guests, and they never dig holes in the garden. Their behavior is impeccable, which I always chalked up to good training and firm, but loving, discipline.
But some of the dogs’ other behaviors had started to raise my suspicions. For example, they always clean up after themselves when going potty in the yard. One carries a small rake and shovel while the others prefer plastic bags. I’ve never seen such a thing. Not only are they exemplars of etiquette; they have to be the smartest creatures God has ever created.
A couple years ago, one of our chickens escaped and wobbled its way into the Noem’s backyard. By the time I saw it out our kitchen window, I shrieked but realized it was too late to try and save it. I assumed our poor Dottie was history. But not only did the Noem’s dogs not tear her to pieces; one of them put Dottie on its back and returned her to our coop. It even made sure to latch the gate on its way out. I was absolutely dumbfounded.
The final straw was six months ago when Kristi pulled into the driveway late one evening. Every one of her dogs rushed to the edge of the pavement, sat up on their hind legs and saluted Kristi with their right paws as she exited the vehicle. They held the pose until she was out of their line of sight. My jaw nearly cracked our hardwood floor, and I felt this sudden chill telling me to lock the doors and windows.
I’ve run that moment over in my mind ever since, and every time I would get the same chill up my arm. It was like a work of science fiction, and I just couldn’t make sense of it.
That is until I heard the news last week of Kristi’s new memoir, in which she tells a story of shooting and killing one of the family’s puppies, Cricket, for misbehaving and terrorizing a chicken coop. The other dogs must have witnessed her brutality. Either that, or word travels fast in the animal kingdom.
Upon learning of that story, everything else started to make more sense. Although I still can’t figure out how a dog learned to use a rake and shovel.