REPORT: ‘Taylor Swift Concert Amnesia’ a real thing, Taylor Swift hardest hit
Last weekend, pop music star Taylor Swift packed 130,000 fans over two nights into Cincinnati’s Paycor Stadium. Whether those fans will remember the experience, however, remains to be seen.
That is because of a new scientific discovery known as “Taylor Swift Concert Amnesia,” in which fans have such transcendent, nearly out-of-body experiences at her performances that they are unable to recall key moments of the shows when asked about them later. Because fans are exposed to so much during a show, such as loud noises, strobe lights, numerous prop and costume changes, and lethal levels of excitement and anticipation, they are unable to remember it all.
Taylor Swift’s adoring fans aren’t the only ones who have had trouble recalling her shows. The singer herself, it turns out, has been diagnosed with the most severe case of concert amnesia anyone has ever seen.
This revelation emerged Sunday after Swift sat down for an exclusive interview with Battle Line. When asked for her reaction of the Cincinnati performances, she stared back at the reporter with a look of unbridled confusion.
“I’m sorry, what happened in Cincinnati?” she asked.
“The two shows you just performed in front of over 100,000 fans at the Bengals’ stadium,” the reporter replied. “You dominated the headlines in Ohio for weeks leading up to the event. The city’s mayor even proclaimed June 30th ‘Taylor Swift Day.’”
“I’m afraid I haven’t the faintest idea what you’re talking about,” she said.
It went on like this for a few more minutes. Battle Line would mention a particular tour venue or rumors of her writing songs about ex-boyfriends. We even asked about the infamous time Kanye West interrupted her acceptance speech at the 2009 MTV Video Music Awards.
No matter what we brought up, she had no recollection. In fact, Swift appeared to be in such a state of confusion that we assisted her in seeking medical help.
(Later, during a more lucid moment, Swift gave Battle Line permission to share the results of the doctor’s reports that outlined her newfound condition. Celebrities love raising awareness about things.)
According to the reports, Swift suffers from such a heightened case of concert amnesia that she has no idea she is one of the most famous singers in the world. She has no memory whatsoever of her performances in Cincinnati or any other city for that matter.
As far as Swift knows, she works at a small tractor supply store with her father in rural Nebraska. She enjoys listening to the radio and singing in the shower. She once performed Bonnie Tyler’s ‘Total Eclipse of the Heart’ during a competition at the county fair, finishing runner-up.
But that is the beginning and end of her musical career. The dozens of awards and trophies resting on her shelves, she asserts, are from a Tuesday night bowling league she and her high school friends have played in since 2014.
Therefore, the person who essentially birthed the concept of concert amnesia is also its biggest sufferer. It might make sense, considering no one has had more exposure to Taylor Swift’s performances than Taylor Swift.
In Cincinnati, July 21st has been designated “Concert Amnesia Day.”